Breathe.

I just want to write an encouraging blog tonight. I sit here and listen to Paramore and it just makes me feel better. This song always gets me. It says "Breathe for love tomorrow because theres no hope for today." I mean, wow. Even if you feel like you don't have hope for today there is tomorrow! Most of us are healthy and will get the chance to live another day. I don't know how many people read this, if any at all, but if you are going through something right now I just want you to have hope. Jesus has given me so much, and even when I feel like nothing is changing or that there is no hope for the things I pray for, He proves me wrong. I just keep praying and hoping for the things that I know that HE has put on my heart. So so soo much has been going on in my life lately and it has made it really hard to endure. I've had a rough patch, and just a lot of drama. It has been extremely hard on me spiritually, physically, and mentally.

For some reason I keep getting negative comments about myself from people and about my friends. I see this as a test of faith. I'm honestly getting verrry frustrated at all of this. It has effected my life in every way. I just keep going and going and I will NOT stop. I know that people cannot see what God tells me. Heck, sometimes I can't see what he is telling me. But I can't make it anymore clear than this:

God has set these people on my heart. As Christians they are on all of our hearts. But it goes much much deeper than that with me. God has put a since of desperation over me for these people. I can't stop reaching out and loving and building relationships with them even if I wanted too. It's much farther beyond that. And as much as it kills me at points, as much as it breaks me down, I hand that to God and realize that he is soo much stronger and that in the end this is what I am to do. I don't water anything down with anyone, I get real. I'm not scared to have flaws in front of them for fear that they wont want Jesus because I am not perfect. As a matter of fact, they accept him even more so when they see my screw up and acknowledge it and change it.

Now i'm just rambling so sorry, lol. But I really had to get all of that off my chest.

Please spread my blog

Love,

Bevinn